Sometimes I wonder..

[erratio]

..whether pop culture has spoiled us when it comes to romance. By the image of what a relationship 'should' be rather than what it is. By the crushing expectations we feel like we need to live up to.

I wonder whether, if there was no terms 'going out' or 'dating' or 'boyfriend' or 'girlfriend', would it change the way we acted around eachother? Or are these expectations somehow innate, or built up after only seeing other relationships?

bleh. All relationships are unique. Or so i like to think.

Comments

[rcmasteraa.livejournal.com]

To me I'm not 'dating' or 'going out' because these terms give me the impression that it's not going to last i.e. they're so flimsy.
Me and Lily are together and that's that.

We need 'girlfriend' and 'boyfriend' though otherwise how would be categorise our partner?

[acute-angle.livejournal.com]

by calling them 'partner' i guess

[rcmasteraa.livejournal.com]

Too sterile and generic. You could be my partner :P

[erratio.livejournal.com]

I beg to differ. Partner implies a defacto kind of relationship to me, someone who you intend to be with for the long haul. Boyfriend and girlfriend are more terms that imply its a temporary thing

[rcmasteraa.livejournal.com]

Of course this is all a deeply personal thing so to me I don't 'see' how boyfriend or girlfriend imply temporary things, if you see what I mean. Guess we'll have to agree to disagree.

[erratio.livejournal.com]

fair enough. Abstract concepts are always fun when you really into what people think of when they hear the word :p

[doctorer.livejournal.com]

Partner is one of my hated words in English speaking culture. It at once removes all distinction between different levels of familiarity, intimacy, friendship and relationship while simultaneously cheapening all of them.

A "partner" wife is very much NOT the same as a "partner" girlfriend, but referring to both the same way regards them as equivalent. I find this unacceptable.

[erratio.livejournal.com]

as i said, to me partner implies being in it for the long haul. Therefore you could argue that 'partner' is not a term applicable to someone you would otherwise call 'girlfriend'.
But then again 'girlfriend' seems much too transitory to me.

/me goes back to my fence-sitting and pondering

[doctorer.livejournal.com]

Your interpretation to be sure, but I'm speaking of the way it is used as a convenient catch-all term for any kind of relationship, serious or otherwise. The growing acceptance this is having reflects a much deeper problem as described above.

This post-modern universal acceptance thing is rubbish. Something is not made acceptable by someone merely wanting to do it, then saying they "feel it is right".