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1. Today I managed to break all my previous stupidity records.
I walked into a wall.
Now in my defense, let me point out that this was at 4am and I'd just turned all the lights off prior to heading out the door when I suddenly remembered that I'd left my mobile upstairs. So I headed to the stairs, only to find that they'd mysteriously moved about 30cm to the left. At this stage I will point out that I am a compulsive stair-jumper. Whether it be up or down, I have a tendency to take stairs at least two at a time, sometimes three if I'm feeling particularly energetic. So I got a faceful of corner at a considerable force, enough to make my glasses fall off and leave me standing in pitch blackness clutching at my face in agony. After realising that nothing was bleeding and that if I didn't get a move on I would miss my bus I felt around on the floor for my glasses and finished heading upstairs, turning on a light in my room to aid me in locating the phone, and then back to pitch blackness and leaving the house.
In related news, I now need a new pair of glasses, as the old pair mysteriously became too crooked for me to sraighten out by brute force, and apparently the frames are too old to be properly fixed without breaking. So for now it's a choice between being half-blind or having a headache from lenses that are at the wrong angle for my eyes, at least until I can have my eyes checked for the first time in many a year and commission a new pair of glasses. Guess which one it is right now?
2. Yesterday I had an inexplicably hungry day. Let's examine my day: eat breakfast, went to work, had a brunch bar after work, went to uni, had a giant vegan burger for lunch, went to stats tute, went to the dumpling and noodle house down the road for another full meal, went to the supermarket in Bondi Junction to buy EVEN MORE FOOD, at which point my hunger mysteriously disappeared and left me with a full shopping bag and no real desire to eat any of the contents (I later went to bed without eating anything more other than an oat fruit slice thingy, so I suspect my calories ended up balancing in the end). But until that point, a typical exchange with a friend would go like this:
me: I'm hungry..
friend: But you just finished eating five minutes ago!
me: I'm hungry..
Perhaps I'm channelling my good buddy Hein, he of the power to eat two meals to everyone else's one. I'm glad it's over, in any case. And on that note, it's now time for my lunch!
I walked into a wall.
Now in my defense, let me point out that this was at 4am and I'd just turned all the lights off prior to heading out the door when I suddenly remembered that I'd left my mobile upstairs. So I headed to the stairs, only to find that they'd mysteriously moved about 30cm to the left. At this stage I will point out that I am a compulsive stair-jumper. Whether it be up or down, I have a tendency to take stairs at least two at a time, sometimes three if I'm feeling particularly energetic. So I got a faceful of corner at a considerable force, enough to make my glasses fall off and leave me standing in pitch blackness clutching at my face in agony. After realising that nothing was bleeding and that if I didn't get a move on I would miss my bus I felt around on the floor for my glasses and finished heading upstairs, turning on a light in my room to aid me in locating the phone, and then back to pitch blackness and leaving the house.
In related news, I now need a new pair of glasses, as the old pair mysteriously became too crooked for me to sraighten out by brute force, and apparently the frames are too old to be properly fixed without breaking. So for now it's a choice between being half-blind or having a headache from lenses that are at the wrong angle for my eyes, at least until I can have my eyes checked for the first time in many a year and commission a new pair of glasses. Guess which one it is right now?
2. Yesterday I had an inexplicably hungry day. Let's examine my day: eat breakfast, went to work, had a brunch bar after work, went to uni, had a giant vegan burger for lunch, went to stats tute, went to the dumpling and noodle house down the road for another full meal, went to the supermarket in Bondi Junction to buy EVEN MORE FOOD, at which point my hunger mysteriously disappeared and left me with a full shopping bag and no real desire to eat any of the contents (I later went to bed without eating anything more other than an oat fruit slice thingy, so I suspect my calories ended up balancing in the end). But until that point, a typical exchange with a friend would go like this:
me: I'm hungry..
friend: But you just finished eating five minutes ago!
me: I'm hungry..
Perhaps I'm channelling my good buddy Hein, he of the power to eat two meals to everyone else's one. I'm glad it's over, in any case. And on that note, it's now time for my lunch!
